Ok..so after about one month, we got our first call about a "situation" from our social worker. This call is what adoptive parents are expecting and dreading because you're being presented about situations that one may or may not be able to handle.
First call...Situation- Baby boy was born Nov 22nd, healthy baby, big boy , born 10 lbs! Currently in foster care. Birthmother is already back at work! She works in a warehouse driving a forklift! Hearty woman. The one red flag is evidence of substance abuse found in the baby meconium. Actually this hardly fazes us. Based on literature, discussions with pediatricians, sustained alcohol binge drinking is much worse than occasional cocaine use, LSD, speed, pot, etc. Essentially, if the birthmother drinks ..forget it. We would've considered the situation but "J" had a trial in NYC. This happens about once a year . So its bad timing. Our social worker warned that once these situations come up , we would have to drop everything..and fly/drive out to the birthmother. In this case, she lived in Kentucky, and "J" couldn't do it. I could ! But obviously , both of us have to make the trip. So we passed....
Second call ,about 5 days later. I remember this distinctly because I was sick as a dog with the FLU! We get the call about a situation that has so many red flags. Sketchy medical, psych history, birth father in jail, birthmother's jail history ..there were too many flags..so we passed.
Then we get a third call...
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